Secret Lover

by Stephanie Chen

I can still recall the day I met Richard.

That was a rainy day; I went to the supermarket to buy some items. When I walked out of the department store, trying to hail a taxi, a car stopped in front of me and a man outreached his head and inquired the way to the First Bank. I explained but it seemed that he could not understand. The bank happened to be neighboring my house, so I got into his car.

At first, we were just friends; maybe getting along better than other friends, but that's all we were. After all, being married to Mark, I shouldn't develop any relations with another man. However, one day Richard invited me to his place to celebrate his birthday. That day he looked different. As he held my hand to cut the cake with him, I realized something was growing between us. Then we had wonderful sex together.

My husband was standard "good man"--working hard and longing for a peaceful place to rest after work. He took the whole responsibility of raising the family and hoped that I could be a good wife and housewife. Our six-year married life was so simple that not a ripple was ever stirred up. I was trying to find something to fulfill my life, but my husband thought my going out to work would be his humiliation. He disliked children so we had none. All I could do was to take part in some short-term courses.

Richard was a shock to me and my life. Never had I known that life would be so interesting until I met him. Being with him, I never feel the passing of time. Everything to him is so fresh that he is willing to try. I never see him run out of energy; his passion attracts me a lot. However, the education I've received tells me that it is wrong to continue our relationship. Every time I woke up from a nightmare in which my husband was staring at me with hateful eyes and demanded to separate with me, I would sit up from the bed and break out with a cold sweat. However, I'm so sentimentally attached to Richard's tenderness. On the other hand, I wouldn't want to destroy the peaceful life with my husband. Furthermore, every time after I have spent some time with Richard, out of guilt and my fulfilled heart, I would become more thoughtful and tender to my husband. Richard never minds that I'm married; he looks upon on the time we shared together, and he never forces me to make decisions.

After a lot of thought, I decided to hide the truth from my husband. At least this moment I am happy. No matter what I will pay for the happiness, I think it's worth it. As to what would happen? Leave it to tomorrow.

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