2008 Spring—Oral Training for Sophomores
Jo Ho

A Cleaner Way to Act Naughty in the Bedroom


游昭嫺報告

As sinful pleasure go, breakfast in bed ranks as one of the least wicked ─ slothful and slightly gluttonous, but not exactly worthy of ecclesiastical condemnation. Yet people routinely deny themselves this minor indulgence, often for one of two reasons: they either feel guilty about being so lazy, or they fret about food particles falling between their sheets.

There』s no quick fix for the guilt-ridden, save for frequent reminders to relax and live a little. But neat people can now enjoy a worry-free breakfast in bed thanks to the Buon Appetito, a satin duvet cover outfitted with an elongated cotton bib.

When the food arrives, the cover』s user pulls its upper flap over his torso and ties it around his neck. Crumbs are thus prevented from secreting themselves within the linens.

The product』s designers, Olga Bielawska and Astrid Schildkopf, came up with the idea in late 2005, while attending the Bauhaus-Universitat Weimar in Weimar, Germany. 「We had the idea to make a project about errors, about the everyday problems and little mishaps that happen,」 Ms. Schildkopf said. She and Ms. Bielawska sat down and thought about the various accidents that occur in each room of a house.

When the conversation turned to the bedroom, Ms. Schildkopf and Ms. Bielawska first thought of lewd mishaps, which are tough to remedy through product design. But they soon turned to another naughty activity. 「Eating in bed is a thing you really should not do, because you get all the crumbs,」 Ms. Schildkopf said. 「We thought, 『O.K., how can we play with that? How can we make a positive product that invites you to do something that you normally should not do?』」

Inspired by the bibs used by infants and lobster connoisseurs alike, the designers tried sewing a narrow cotton flap onto a bedsheet. Ms. Schildkopf, the designated tester, quickly discovered that the bib needed to be longer and more billowy, because toast crumbs can travel surprisingly far. She also played with the size of the straps that secure the cloth to a breakfaster』s neck; too big a hole for the neck would leave pajama tops exposed, but too small an aperture would make the bib uncomfortable.

To imbue it with some culinary atmosphere, Ms. Schildkopf and Ms. Bielawska decided to make the bib out of red-and-white-checkered cotton, the traditional tablecloth material for Italian restaurants worldwide.

Ms. Schildkopf and Ms. Bielawska founded a Weimar design studio called Miss Geschick and Lady Lapsus and later decided to industrialize production of the bib.

If there is a drawback, it is that the bib isn』t detachable. Splatter yolk or syrup on it, and the whole duvet cover must go into the laundry. Very neat people might have to settle for toast-only breakfast in bed.