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Q:
I am a 26-year-old female in a long-term, committed relationship. However, when my boyfriend is out, I sometimes have intercourse with my dog. How common is this, can I get a disease and is this cheating?
A: There is a great deal of controversy surrounding sex with animals. Zoophilia, bestiality or zoosexual are the terms most commonly associated with this.
Recent studies show about 17 percent of boys raised on farms reported sexual contact with animals.
However, evidence suggests that zoophilia may be more widespread then we may think. Check out a book by Hani Miletski called "Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia" (drmiletski.com).
Zoosexuality is described in the "Zoo" community as a sexual orientation, in the same category as hetero-, homo- and bisexuality. The profound emotional and/or physical attraction to animals can be manifested in many ways, including sex. Not everyone has an emotional attachment to his or her animal lover; some just do it for the sexual release.
Sexual behaviors typically include oral sex and intercourse. Some of the animals most frequently involved are dogs, cats, horses, goats and snakes.
There are laws against sexual contact with animals in most states (including Pennsylvania), with fines or jail time of up to 10 years.
In most relationships, sex outside the relationship is considered cheating. My guess is that you haven't told you boyfriend because you have some fears about how he may react.
Your guilt indicates that what you are doing has potential consequences for you. If this is a behavior that you wish to continue, you must have an open and honest communication with your boyfriend so that he can make a decision for himself.
The good news is that there is nothing physically unhealthy about this behavior. Aside from getting scratched or perhaps fleas, there are no specific diseases to fear, and you cannot get pregnant.
Psychologically speaking however, if this behavior does cause you distress, it may be helpful to speak with a counselor. *
Chris Fariello, M.A., M.F.T., is a senior staff therapist at the Council for Relationships, specializing in issues of sexuality, gender and anger. Opinions expressed here are not a substitute for therapeutic or medical intervention. If you have a relationship or sexual concern, consult a qualified health-care provider. E-mail him at good.sex@phillynews.com, or write him care of the Daily News, Box 7788, Philadelphia, PA 19101.
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