Patty

From misery to miracle

    I hated my self when I was a little girl. My swarthy skin won me the nickname 「chocolate.」 I wore glasses with thick lenses. What was even worse, I had protruding teeth that seemed to get more and more obvious. I was kind of wallowing in self –pity especially after I started my school life. But in contrast, my parents treated me as if I was a princess. They brought me to the beauty salon to do my hairdo and chose the beautiful brand name clothes for me. Like a spoiled child, I could almost get anything I want.

   During my school life, the most frightening thing for me was public speech. I was extremely afraid to face the crowd. When doing a speech, one can never escape from opening one』s mouth. It was so embarrassing for me to do that, especially with what I considered my abnormal and unusual looks. I couldn』t endure anyone staring at me and my goose pimples would rise up right away. To be honest, I really wanted to become invisible. It might have been better if nobody paid any attention to me. I didn』t want to be a laughingstock because of my silly looks. I rarely looked at the mirror-too real for me.

    Sarcastically, friends around me often thought of me as a joke. The most attractive and popular thing among the classmates was to gossip about one another』s appearances. Once upon a time, several friends and I were preparing to take a picture. Suddenly one of the girls whispered」 Who would take a shot with Patty? She is so ugly!」 I heard it and it reechoed hundred of times in my minds. I really worried I would be excluded from them because of my appearance. When it came to comparisons, it was a keen competition. The words used were very sharp and ironic. Nonetheless, I pretended to keep calm every time when I listened to the gossip. Though I knew they might only be teasing, I still felt that I was the one being laughed at.

   As time went by, my parents finally advised me to go to the orthodontics and I accepted their suggestion. Doctors provided me with several ways to correct the irregular teeth. I followed every word he said because I was eager to be more beautiful. But I never knew that I had to suffer a great torment for I was set with brace equipment not only inside my mouth but also an outside helmet. Wires with tiny stainless steel hooks were attached on my protruding teeth and they would be tightened at regular intervals. Rubber bands were hooked and interwoven between teeth. Sometimes I couldn』t sleep because it caused too much pain. People often looked at me with the oddest eyes as if I was a patient who was undergoing a serious surgery. I was both mentally and physically 「fixed」 for it around three years.

   Everything was totally changed after I took the stuff off. Just like Cinderella in the fairy tale, I was transformed into an attractive princess. I was content with the outcome and I miraculously seemed to become another person. When attending the class reunion, no one could recognize me including my bosom friends. I have become more and more confident since then. My philosophy of life is now optimistic and bright. The great difference is how natural I am when confronted with people. Now I will look at myself in the mirror without hesitation.