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Being Forced to Give It Up

Life in America

Anton

            While stepping out the flight gate two and a half years ago in Atlanta, USA, I was anticipating a colorful American life style.  As soon as I saw my host mother holding a white balloon in her right hand a big smile on her face, I knew it was going to be a great year.  Being an exchange student was my dream when I was a freshman in high school.

My host family took me in instantly and treated me as a regular member of the family.  Since my host parents are both from Florida, I had the chance to drive down to the Atlantic coast with them on vacations.  One time we drove all the way down to visit the southern tip of the North American continent--Key West.  The view of the sunset was fabulous and breath-taking.  The golden glow shined on the ocean with several boats gliding along the waters calmly.  People were either standing or sitting on their porches built on the beach to enjoy that glorious scene.  I watched silently, afraid to disturb that peaceful moment.  That was one scene that I would never forget.

Besides these special trips, my daily life in school was also quite enjoyable. With my friends from school, we would host parties in turns or sleep over at one another』s houses playing pool or watching video all night long.  But nothing compared with water rafting, one of the most thrilling sports I had ever joined.  Bouncing up and down in the rapidly flowing water, we tried so hard to keep the raft in balance but in vain because the water was too rapid and powerful to control.  Those were really good times.

After several months of enjoyable 「honey moon」 time, I had to make a decision whether to stay in the United States to continue my further education or to return to Taiwan.  My mother told me not to worry about the money; my parents would take care of it.  However, I just could not allow myself to spend their money when I imagine my parents have to tighten their budget every month in order to cover my spending.  Besides financial concern, every time when my dad called me from overseas, I could sense his sadness over the phone, though he didn』t say it clearly.  Once, my mom sent me some photos taken at the airport when I was leaving.  In the pictures, her eyes were red with tears, though she kept it under control.  Seeing her sad looks and thinking of my father』s sad voice, I sank into a great dilemma: should I stay and fulfill my dreams or should I go home to comfort my parents?  The tough decision kept me awake night after night.  By the time of Christmas, I realized I had to make a decision and, to my parents』 delight, I decided to leave and go home.

Sometimes I feel sorry for not staying in the States when I look back at the decision I made then.  Perhaps I would have had more opportunities if I had studied in an American University, to pursue my 「American dream」.  Nevertheless, I could never bring back the past no matter how hard I try.  It』s best that I move ahead.  For there are loads of chances out there waiting for me as long as I intend to give it a shot.  Who knows?  Maybe one day I will go back to the States to finish what I started.

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