I have lived in Keelung
for over twenty years. Before 20, I had not traveled abroad, merely
visited scenic spots far away from home. From being an elementary
school student to a junior high student, I was told to come back home
right away after school. My two schools are very near to my house; it
just took me less than fifteen minutes to arrive at the schools from
home. Frankly speaking, I did not know how to take a bus until I
graduated from elementary school.
At
a time, as I was a junior-high-school student, after a final exam, a few
classmates invited me to visit Taipei. Not to say, I was full of
excitement and asked Mother for permission to join this excursion.
However, to my disappointment, Mother refused my request, and the
reason was her worries about my safety. I spent lots of time assuring
her, telling her about our destinations and my classmate』s sufficient
experiences in visiting Taipei. But she just said 「No.」 「Without
parents』 accompanying, I do not agree.」 I did my best to persuade her
but all in vain. Filled with sadness and anger, I carried on a cold war
with Mother. A few days later, Mother not only inquired of my
classmates about the visit but also called their parents to discuss the
safety problem. Through a number of phone calls, finally she agreed.
Although I could visit Taipei, I felt exhausted.
This experience impressed me lot.
When I became an English-major at N.C.U, I made up my
mind to visit America in the coming four years. In my first summer
vocation at university, I stayed in Cheng-Kung-Ling for one-month for
military training. As I was a sophomore, I informed Mother that I would
leave for America alone to visit my friend during the summer vocation.
「It
is too dangerous! You have no experience going abroad, and you both are
just students. How can I not worry?」
Again, without consideration, she disagreed immediately.
「I
am majoring in English, so I need to visit an English-speaking country
to test my learning.」 I sincerely said what I thought.
「Who said that? You can learn English very well in Taiwan.」
「But, mom, going abroad is also good for me, and to experience the
western culture is really useful to me.」
「You just desire to play abroad. It costs lot!」 Mother said. It
seemed a threat, which meant that she would not supply my traveling
expenses.
「Well, I can look for part-time jobs or be a tutor, making money to pay
my expenses as possible as I can.」
「What? Since you have ability in making a fortune, why aren』t you
responsible for your tuition on your own from now on!」
「Mom, come on, I did not mean that. I just want to carry out my
dream.」 I replied in a bit of helpless tone.
「As
you work, you will have many chances to visit abroad.」
「No, by that time I would be tied down by my occupation.」
「I
just disagree! No argument anymore.」 Afterwards, she refused to go on.
I
was in a dilemma. On one hand, I realized that Mother』s firm
disagreement was due to her natural maternal concern. To be a
considerate son, should I be obedient to give up my insistence? On the
other hand, I knew it was a valuable chance to grow up and to be
independent. And, I desired to arrange my third summer vocation at
N.C.U for studying at a cram school. Moreover, as for the future, it
would be full of uncertainties. Hence, if I miss this chance to go
abroad, I would be more remote from my dream.
Nevertheless, this time Mother』s disagreement was much more resolute
than before. I decided not to discuss this matter for a while.
Luckily, at the same time, I got a tutoring job.
When the summer vocation was coming, one day I told Mother that I was
going to apply for an American visa. Unfortunately, conflicts broke out
again.
「Did you not listen to what I said? I told you I did not agree.」
「Don』t you think that I will worry about you?」 「Do you consider that
you could do anything you desire and ignore my feelings?」
I
felt helpless. With a firm determination, I began to communicate with
Mother. And all I could act was to not only show my will but prove my
safety. One evening afterwards, Mother was gradually touched. 「Let me
think about it carefully.」 She ended our conversations.
Because of her eternal love toward her child, Mother made concessions.
Afterwards, she started to prepare the necessities for me. Before
leaving, I gave her a thankful embrace. However, Mother showed me her
endless concern.