Society has built up gender stereotypes in people』s mind, which develop
into bias. In general, society takes the stereotype as a ruler to
categorize how boys and girls should look like and what they should do
as a boy or a girl. And most people easily make judgments based on
these gender norms. People who are not identified as typical are often
criticized or ostracized. More importantly, Gender stereotypes could
become serious obstacles for intimate relationships, such as that
between a father and a son. My own personal experience serves as a good
example.
My
father was a military personnel and perhaps because of years of
experience in the military, he has developed a strong gender stereotype
for what boys should and should not do. He never allows me to go into
the kitchen in front of him because he thinks that is a woman』s place.
To him, boys should be interested in robots, ball games, and outdoor
activities. Unfortunately, I have never been able to live up to his
expectations, so we always argue over such things. Besides, his gender
stereotype also became an obstacle for my interests and education. When
I was young, I was interested in playing the piano. Yet he was strongly
opposed to it and angrily brought me back from the teacher』s home more
than once. He quarreled with my mom again and again over those 「sissy」
Things. In fact, I stopped learning those so-called sissy things, such
as playing piano, writing, participating the school singing group, and
so on because of his 「help.」 I had argued with him a million times but
always in vein. Under the pressure of his stereotypes, my free will was
simply never respected.
My
father』s hard-nosed beliefs about my manhood were even carried over to
my studies. I had always been interested in philosophy and literature;
I could sit and read books all day long. So when I was graduating from
high school, I decided to major in either philosophy or literature in
college. Unsurprisingly, when I brought up this idea, my father was
extremely angry about it. To him, philosophy and literature were sissy
hobbies. He thought they could never help men make a fortune, not even
make a living. In that period of time, every time we met each other, we
argued. Sometimes I was so frustrated that I wanted to just give him a
punch if he was not my father. I thought maybe being a pain in the ass
was his lifelong goal.
Gender
stereotypes are anachronisms and they really hurt. My father never
understands how his stubbornly traditional thoughts and behavior have
done great harm to his children, let alone destroying his relationship
with them. I am clearly aware that it is hardly possible to affect my
father even a little. All I hope is one day my father will accept and
support my choice--one day.