Usually, we believe all parents love their children
and are willing to provide the latter with everything. Also, parents
often regard as definitely necessary whatever they offer to their kids,
such as a good education, a nice living environment, abundant
allowances, and so on. Sometimes, parents keep their children from
doing certain things in order to protect the latter from being harmed.
Most importantly, parents want their children to be superior to them
when the latter grow up. These expectations, which may very well rise
from good intentions, make parents push their kids forward. Yet,
parents do not realize that over-protection or over control often lead
to tragic consequences. Moreover, the consequences cause conflicts,
which may never heal between parents and children.
In Elia Kazan』s classic movie, 「 Splendor In the
Grass」, the interactions between parents and children were presented
exquisitely. The main actor, Bud chose to always listen to what his
father told him to do – being the best athlete at school, studying hard,
entering Yale, returning home to take over dad』s oil business. Bud』s
life seemed well arranged and he didn』t have to worry about anything,
but follow the track. However, his consciousness and his action were
constantly fighting, because Bud did not want to enter Yale; instead,
he』d rather to be a rancher and marry Deanie (his girl friend). Sadly,
Deanie broke down when she knew Bud would never return to her (I』ll
explain it later), and then she was sent to a mental institute. Bud
shouted at his father and said he would marry Deanie no matter how. He
punched on the wall and burst in to tears when he knew Deanie』s serious
condition. That was the first time Bud ever did so. However, Bud did
not stand up against his father』s will until he was in the Yale. He
realized that college education did not interest him at all. As the
result, Bud had a meeting with the dean and his father because of his
poor grades in school. That was the moment when Bud made public what he
repressed in his heart – he wanted to go home. Unexpectedly, Bud』s dad
jumped off the building in New York when his business went down like a
thud during the Great Depression. He could no longer hold Bud』s free
will anymore.
As for Deanie, Bud』s precious love in high school,
everything was like a miracle in the beginning. A girl from a grocer』s
family owned a prosperous, handsome young man』s love. However, Deanie』s
mother kept her from having sex with Bud, and that was the ruling value
in that era. A well-behaving girl should not have sex with boys unless
they get married; otherwise, the man will not respect his wife. Because
of the virginity complex, Deanie held back her desires every time when
Bud tried to have more intimate contacts with her. But she didn』t
tell Bud the reason, which ultimately interrupted their love. And that
was why Bud decided to end their relationship. Deanie was trapped in
self-contradiction; she did not know what to do. Even though she tried
to change her appearance and flaunt her sexuality, Bud could not get
used to what she had became. Deanie could not get any help from her
mother, either. When Deanie screamed and laughed crazily in the
bathroom and threatened she would commit suicide, it did frighten her
mother. As it turned out, Deanie stayed in the hospital for two years
because of a mental broke down. And she didn』t forgive her mother,
though she said she didn』t hate her.
Another obvious and interesting case was Bud』s
sister, Ginny. Ginny decided to be what she wanted to be no matter what
her father expected of her. She dared to break the tradition that boys
and girls were not supposed to have sex before marriage. Even though
her father kept her home and wanted her to be a 「normal」 girl, she
firmly refused to accept it. Instead, Ginny grabbed every possible
opportunity to express her wild desires, such as going out with married
men, having relationship with different men at the same time, and so
on. All those behaviors that were not allowed in the 1930』s were
carried out by Ginny. However, the social pressure was so powerful that
Ginny could not bear it on her own and that indirectly killed Ginny.
The movie reveals the real situation commonly taking
place in our society. On the surface, parents wish their children to
become superior. In fact, parents expect their kids to achieve the
goals, which they themselves could not reach before. Or, the parents
just simply want their children to become what they want them to be. As
long as parents have this sort of concept and push their kids to the
edge, what happened in the movie 「Splendor in the Grass」 will continue
to take place again and again. And that is not what we are willing to
see.