Tips to Calm Down

1. Just Say NO! 

Much of the stress you feel comes from over committing yourself-saying yes when you want to say no. Get clear about your values. What is important to you? Say yes to the things that are congruent with your values. Say no to the other things. There is a consequence to every yes and every no you say. If you say yes to work, friends, family, church and community, you are probably saying no to your health and time for yourself. Know when to say no.

2. Ask for Help

You don』t need to do it all or be it all. Look for people or services that can give you support. You can easily do twice as much with the help of others. But that means you need to ask for their help. Don』t expect others to be able to read your mind. Know yourself well enough to recognize when you need help. It is the foolish - and stressed - person who tries to do it all alone.             

3. Less is More

Start simplifying your life. The more things you have the more things you need to care for, clean, dust, service, maintain, protect. 

At holidays, remember that less is more and don』t strap yourself with bills you can』t pay. A single chocolate that is savored, brings more enjoyment than a box that is hastily consumed. Doing a few things with depth brings greater satisfaction and pleasure than trying to do it all.

4. Take a Break 

Give yourself physical, mental and emotional breaks. If you』re doing physical work, give yourself a break every couple of hours and do something different for a few minutes. If you』re doing mental work, stop and look out the window and let your mind daydream for a few minutes. If you are filled with an emotion of sadness or frustration or depression, give yourself a break. Try some laughter. Taking regular breaks helps you maintain balance in your life. 

5. Stop Value Judging
Most people spend lots of time shoulding on themselves. "I should do this, I shouldn』t do that. I should have said this, I shouldn』t have said that." All those shoulds are value judgments that create stress and lower your self-esteem. Try accepting yourself, others and reality. You will feel less upset, less angry and more calm. It is not the situations of life that upset you. Rather, it is your expectations of what "should" be that upsets you. 

   Reprint Notice: Permission to reprint or reproduce the above material in a newsletter or other publication is granted provided that it includes the following: 「 Copyright © 1998-2004, Barbara Braham, 1143 Neil Avenue, Columbus, Ohio 43201.

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